Respond to these rapid questions in our Shortcut quiz and we will tell you which Shortcut character you are. Play it now.
The ability to be fair-minded when judging a high-concept horror film as nebulous as “Shortcut” is difficult to come by, especially given the film’s possible similarities to “Jeepers Creepers 2,” which is also a horror film about teenagers who are trapped and terrorized by a humanoid bat monster, is even more difficult to come by. To be sure, a large number of American indie horror films are distractingly self-referential, and “Shortcut” is no exception to this rule. In addition, even if you ignore the similarities between “Shortcut” and that other film (which has, for many horror fans, understandably become radioactive following director Victor Salva’s now infamous arrest and conviction on charges of pedophilia and child pornography), “Shortcut” is not strong enough to be worth defending.
“Shortcut” is both an amateurish production and a mindless genre exercise based solely on its own merits, and neither is particularly memorable. They show only a passing interest in their characters, whose water-taffy-thin personalities are stretched out in tortuous dialogue and voiceover narration that is neither worthy of nor surmountable for the film’s game but inexperienced younger cast members, who play the roles of adults. As a result, while you might not expect much from a high-concept creature feature/teen melodrama like “Shortcut,” the film itself suggests that you should be expecting a lot.
In the absence of that, a higher level of narrative and/or filmmaking craftsmanship would have been appreciated, particularly in a film that begins with aggressively bland voiceover narration—”Every journey has its road.” And every road, sooner or later, comes to a fork in the road. ” After nice guy Nolan (Jack Kane) observes that “no one believed our story or took us seriously,” the film comes to a conclusion. After all, Nolan and his classmates are never really defined or threatened by anything or anyone worthy of mention, so I can’t really blame them—whoever they are.
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While driving through the British countryside, Nolan and his fellow students are confronted with a variety of unexpected dangers, including fallen timber, a serial killer known as “The Tongue Eater” (Daniel Keyes), and, oh yeah, a man-sized bat creature. These generic roadblocks serve only to further the forgettable journey of Nolan and his equally forgettable pals, who are all defined by the kinds of cliches that would make “The Breakfast Club” appear downright avant garde in comparison. In this group are Reggie (Zak Sutcliffe), a pouty outcast with a side shave and Doc Martens-looking boots, and Karl (Zander Emlano), a bratty but good-natured fat kid who daydreams about “double bacon, french fries… and a large drink.” Young women are represented by nerdy Queenie (Molly Dew), who sports baby fat and braces, as well shy artist Bess (Sophie Jane Oliver), in whom Nolan inevitably draws out the inner beauty (“I saw your sketches on the bus, I thought they were amazing”). Everyone in the group is left to fend for themselves after their kind bus driver Joseph (Terence Anderson) abandons them with only some bumper sticker wisdom—”Be brave, kids!”—and nothing else.
Shortcut Quiz
The bat monster that pursues these kids appears to be pretty cool, but he never seems to get a good enough scare out of them, despite the fact that they are armed with hormones, courage, and other such things. To be fair, Nolan’s crew has to contend with the world’s most tedious bat creature, complete with a snooze-inducing backstory. Consequently, I can’t really fault these kids for taking their time to explore the area around their bus stop. The film then contains some sleazy sex jokes, such as when Reggie gives Karl a dirty look after Emlano’s character repeatedly (and vigorously) slaps his thigh in complete darkness. Perhaps you recall Reggie teasingly promising to watch Queenie urinate when she begged him to protect her from predators such as that Tongue Guy. (What, exactly, is his deal?) Actually, Reggie is the closest thing “Shortcut” has to a representative protagonist, as he serves more as a placeholder rather than a symbol of youthful rebellion.
Also, you will find out which character are you in this Shortcut quiz.
For what it’s worth, screenwriter Daniele Cosci makes no mention of the fact that Nolan and Bess are stalked by a hairy howler named “The Nocturnal Wanderer”‘ on the night of a lunar eclipse in his screenplay for the film. It is also possible that Nolan and Bess’s attraction is as genuine as Reggie and Queenie’s love connection, which is defined by Reggie’s characteristic suavitude: “You are kinda cute when you’re mad… should piss you off more.” Even the most talented young actors can only do so much with wet blanket dialogue, such as when Nolan and Bess are struggling to form a romantic connection and end up saying things like, “My mother painted,” and “Like what,” and “All sorts of landscapes[…]with the bluest sea, and amazing white sand,” among other things. Who had the notion that the dialogue was ready to be shot?
About the quiz
Or perhaps a better question is: what exactly drew filmmakers to material like “Shortcut” in the first instance? I’ve seen the movie, and I’m still not sure what I think. Perhaps it is the centuries-old received wisdom that teenagers are more resilient than we believe them to be? We’re all for it, but who exactly are “we” these days? It would be more accurate to call the film “Shortcut” a “Throwback,” but even that doesn’t quite capture the film’s sense of retrograde nostalgia.
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The film is currently playing in theaters and select drive-ins.
For more personality quizzes check this: Baaghi 3 Quiz.
