Respond to these rapid questions in our Kong Skull Island quiz and we will tell you which Kong Skull Island character you are. Play it now.
Generally speaking, all monster films fall into one of two categories: those that reveal the monster gradually over time, and those that reveal the monster immediately and never leave it for long periods of time. If you want to compare it to a movie like Jaws (with sharks and scary music for the first hour), think “Deep Blue Sea” or “Sharknado” (Shark-o-Rama pretty much throughout). The most popular versions of the King Kong story have fallen into the first category: the 1933 original, the 1976 remake, and Peter Jackson’s three-hour 2005 adaptation, all of which gradually revealed the great ape. A little more than half an hour into “Kong: Skull Island,” on the other hand, Kong is introduced and then remains front and center throughout the film’s 118-minute running time (along with a slew of other large, terrifying creatures). When one of the characters tells a story about Kong fighting monsters, the movie cuts to images of Kong battling the monsters, just in case you weren’t getting enough monster-on-monster action already.
I’m not bringing up the difference in approach to condemn the new Kong; on the contrary, I’m emphasizing it. This film, which tells the story of a group of soldiers and scientists who become stranded on Skull Island while on a mission to map the island’s geological interior with explosive charges, which is something you absolutely should not do when visiting a place named Skull Island, is a half-magnificent, half-misguided example of a “show me the monster” film. “The Mysterious Island” and “The Land that Time Forgot,” films that were little more than collections of monster-driven action scenes tied together by a flimsy story about explorers wandering the jungle, doing things they were warned not to do, and getting eaten, were the closest comparisons I could make.
The cast consists of a couple dozen people who are basically monster chow and therefore not worth describing here; a World War II airman who’s been trapped on the island for 28 years (woolly-bearded John C. Reilly, who steals the film instantly and never gives it back); a tough, quiet British SAS officer (Tom Hiddleston) who has amazing hair; a Special Forces colonel (Samuel L. Jackson) who develops an Ahab
But you shouldn’t waste any more time and start this Kong Skull Island quiz.
The latter theory was also advanced in Gareth Edwards’ 2014 monster film “Godzilla,” which featured a gradual reveal of the monster’s identity. In case you hadn’t heard, this new Kong is set in the same universe as Edwards’ “Godzilla,” and it represents the second stage of Warner Bros.’ plan to Marvel-ize the giant monster movie genre by releasing a series of interconnected films that will culminate in King Kong fighting Godzilla in the final installment. While I dislike the studios’ obsession with “expanded universe” storytelling, it appears to be a perfect fit for films that feature apes and giant lizards the size of skyscrapers, as I have previously stated. Do not attempt to argue with me because I speak with the authority of a man who most likely spent months of his childhood making animal and dinosaur figurines fight each other in a sandbox, so don’t even bother trying; there isn’t any point in it.
A large army of visual and sound effects artists persuades you that these CGI titans are alive and breathing and weigh hundreds of tons, and the monsters are brilliantly designed and skillfully animated (with the exception of a few shots in which Kong appears a little cartoonish). The title character attacks his opponents with the ferocity of an MMA fighter, resorting to the use of crude weapons when fists and teeth aren’t enough to win. The creatures that stand between him and victory include a giant octopus, a fleet of Huey gunships, and creatures that have the appearance of wingless pterodactyls with skull-beak heads. In moments of lull between action and plot development, the film introduces new creatures to the humans’ meandering journey across the island, including regular-sized pterodactyls and giant insects, as well as a battleship-sized water buffalo that appears to have been drawn by Hayao Miyazaki. Although the giant ants described by Reilly’s character never materialize, they are mentioned in the novel.
The problem is that “Kong: Skull Island” appears to be uncomfortable with the fact that it is pure childish entertainment. It’s also not enough for the filmmakers to simply reiterate the basic theme expressed in both this film and Evans’ “Godzilla”—that Mother Earth does not belong to us and can shake us off like a bad case of fleas if we become too conceited—in a new way. The film, directed by Jordan Vogt-Roberts (“The Kings of Summer”) and based on a script written by three different writers, is set in 1973, immediately following the United States’ withdrawal from Vietnam. For a while, it appears that this is a convenient way of explaining why the world isn’t already aware of Skull Island (global surveillance satellites were still a relatively new concept in 1973), while also fetishizing mid-century analog technology in the vein of Wes Anderson (there are loving close-ups of 35mm movie and still cameras, vinyl record players, rotary phones, and mainframe computers with magnetic tape spools).
Kong Skull Island Quiz
Also, you will find out which character are you in this Kong Skull Island quiz.
It doesn’t take long, however, to realize that “Kong: Skull Island” is attempting to make other kinds of statements, though it isn’t clear what they are. A thick layer of pop culture homage and political allegory is layered on top of each other, constantly threatening to add up to something, but never actually does. In case you missed it, director Jordan Vogt-Roberts has described the film as a parable of the United States military being swallowed up by the jungles of Vietnam, which includes homages to classic Vietnam films such as Oliver Stone’s “Platoon” and Francis Coppola’s “Apocalypse Now” (the IMAX poster for “Kong: Skull Island” is modeled after Bob Peak’s 1979 poster for Coppola’s film). If director Vogt-Roberts isn’t blatantly plundering the most famous Vietnam-era movie soundtracks (Jefferson Airplane’s “White Rabbit,” Creedence Clearwater Revival’s “Run Through the Jungle,” and The Chambers Brothers’ “The Time Has Come Today” all get a workout), he’s mixing in undigested chunks of Coppola’s “Apocalypse” inspiration, Joseph Conrad (As one of my friends put it, “the smell of ape palm in the morning is wonderful.”)
If the film were weirder and funnier, this kind of stuff would land with a ping instead of a thud on a regular basis—though, to be fair, it is both weird and funny at times, especially when serving up vivid throwaway images, such as a Richard Nixon bobble-head doll bouncing on a chopper’s dashboard or an M-60 machine-gunner bracing his tripod against a Triceratops skull. In the United States, Vogt-Roberts is a rare director who can tell a joke with a shot. The more random the joke is, the more likely it is to be funny.
Unfortunately, every time the film’s prankish eye manages to put a smile on your face, a poorly chosen line or idea shatters the illusion. Throughout the film, characters make cryptic “meaningful” statements such as “We didn’t lose the war, we abandoned it” and “Sometimes the enemy doesn’t exist until you go looking for them,” but these never seem to make sense in the context of images such as Kong surviving a napalm attack or a band of grunts sneaking through a prehistoric killing field.
About the quiz
Also, you must try to play this Kong Skull Island quiz.
The film’s casually ethnocentric approach to portraying Americans as “Americans” and the cultural “Other” as giant apes and cattle and snaggle-toothed demon beasts that scream up from the earth like Vietcong commandos goes unchallenged during this time period. There are also mute tribespeople who worship Kong as a protector-god, and they are known as the Kongs. Or perhaps there is an overarching allegory about the Cold War hidden within the characters’ debates over whether Kong is a good guy or just another monster. Is Vogt-Roberts attempting to establish King Kong as a political-mythological symbol of the United States, similar to Godzilla’s status as a symbol of Japan? Perhaps Kong, the last of his kind, is supposed to be the lone superpower, a kindhearted tough guy who only wants to be left alone but keeps getting drawn into other people’s fights, much like John Wayne, the Hiddleston character’s childhood hero, is supposed to be the lone superpower. Perhaps the communist axis of China and the Soviet Union is represented by the razor-toothed carnivorous beasts, while the bugs and plant eaters and tribespeople represent the unaligned countries. Then again, it’s possible that it won’t.
A large screen with surround sound, as well as through the innocent eyes of a child, is the best way to experience “Kong: Skull Island.” Despite the presence of childhood flashbacks, I prefer my monster movies to contain a touch of poetry, and this one, with the exception of a sequence near the end that features the Aurora Borealis, is devoid of poetry. It’s also devoid of personality, as well. Only Reilly’s wisecracking castaway and a literal-minded lifer played by Shea Whigham, a regular on “Boardwalk Empire,” remain in the viewer’s consciousness. Hong Kong himself is less of a character than a hairy symbol of whatever the film requires at any given time, and the requirements are constantly shifting from one scene to the next. However, you do get to see the big guy slurp octopus tentacles like soup noodles and spike a chopper like a volleyball, and I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t entertaining to watch him do it. There are two and a half stars in this movie, with the extra half-star going to the creatures, which are likely to appear in miniature form in a sandbox near you soon.
For more personality quizzes check this: Get Out Quiz.
