Respond to these rapid questions in our Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 quiz and we will tell you which Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 character you are. Play it now.
Think back to the worst movie you’ve ever seen—a film that didn’t make you laugh, didn’t make you cry, didn’t move you or change you in any way other than giving you the overwhelming desire to run out of the theater as quickly as possible. Consider a motion picture that was a complete and utter waste of both your time and money. Retain that name in your mind for a moment.
The sequel “Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2” is even more deplorable.
It’s possible that this sounds like hyperbole or like I’m piling on. On Rotten Tomatoes, “Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2” currently has a score of 0% as of the time of this writing. (Keep in mind that Sony did not screen it for critics prior to the day it was released, which is never a sign of confidence, and as a result, the reviews are only just beginning to trickle in.) The fact of the matter is that Andy Fickman’s movie does not contain a single redeeming quality or scene. These proceedings have been reheated, and as a result, they have taken on a lifeless and listless air. The jokes fall flat every time. The attempts at slapstick seem forced. The characters lack any depth or complexity. And the half-hearted attempts to show emotion at the very end don’t feel like they were earned.
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This is, for all intents and purposes, the same movie as the inexplicably successful original “Paul Blart: Mall Cop,” which grossed more than $183 million worldwide in 2009. This time around, Kevin James is even less likeable than usual in the role of the title character. When the first movie came out, it seemed impossible that this endearing everyman could play a character that stripped him of all his best on-screen qualities. However, he did just that. Back then, Paul Blart was nothing more than a needy, clueless, and annoying individual as he smugly patrolled a shopping mall in New Jersey on his Segway. In the second part of the series, he is all of those things, but in addition, he is resentful, rude, and condescending, which makes him an even more offensive character.
Paul Blart Mall Cop 2 Quiz
Theoretically, we are supposed to cheer for Paul while he is away in Las Vegas attending a convention for security guards, which is a trip that is long overdue. “Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2” is a vacation posing as a movie shoot, following in the proud tradition of so many recent Happy Madison productions, such as “Just Go With It” (filmed in Hawaii), “Jack and Jill” (filmed on a cruise ship), and “Blended” (filmed in Africa). In addition to that, it is a drawn-out advertisement for the Wynn Las Vegas hotel and resort. (At the very end, Steve Wynn himself makes a cameo appearance that is awkward and completely silent.)
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After suffering a series of heartbreaking defeats, which are all played for cheap laughs, Paul is in desperate need of a pick-me-up. First, his former flame from the first movie suddenly breaks up with him after they have been married for only a week and a half. But what happens to his sweet and dear mother (Shirley Knight), who is killed when a milk truck runs over her in front of her house, is an even more tragic turn of events. (This is not a spoiler, folks; it takes place within the first few minutes of the show. Additionally, it is intended to be humorous for unknown reasons.)
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All that is left for Paul is his sweet adolescent daughter, Maya (Raini Rodriguez), whom he is more obsessively and irrationally protective of than ever before. Therefore, it is only natural that she is unable to share the fantastic news with her father that she was accepted to UCLA. She is obligated to withhold that information in order to provide a manufactured source of tension for the movie.
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Maya is obligated to accompany Paul on his trip to Las Vegas, despite the fact that Paul exemplifies the uncreative stereotype of the tacky tourist with his garish shirts, tight shorts, and cheap ways. On the other hand, when he is under the mistaken impression that he is the keynote speaker at the convention, he walks around with the arrogance of a high roller. This includes acting superior to the hotel’s beautiful and well-groomed general manager, who goes by the name Daniella Alonso. As a result, she naturally falls in love with him. Equally perplexing is the platonic relationship that develops between Maya and one of the valet parking attendants at the hotel, played by David Henrie. He seems to have all day to hang out with her, take her for drinks poolside, and invite her to a party in a posh suite.
Now I’m just nitpicking. There are much bigger problems here. The plot of “Paul Blart: Mall Cop 2” revolves around the idea that the protagonist, Paul, will unwittingly foil a major theft attempt on Wynn’s renowned art collection. The slick and well-dressed mastermind behind the heist is Vincent, who is played by Neal McDonough, who is reprising his role as a generic bad guy. Vincent has infiltrated the hotel’s own security staff in order to carry out the heist. Paul takes his role as a participant in the action very seriously, which leads to a string of embarrassing blunders, pratfalls, and sight gags. These include an altercation with a hostile peacock (whom, by the way, he totally provokes) and an appearance in the Cirque du Soleil show “Le Reve” that lasted much longer than it should have. As part of this process, he also has the responsibility of rescuing Maya, who, despite the expansive size of the Wynn hotel, was still able to figure out the plan and was captured by the bad guys.
James seems to have a soft spot for this particular role, which suggests that he does not yet have a clear understanding of the capabilities that he possesses as an actor. In addition to that, he and his longtime writing partner, Nick Bakay, worked together once again on the script. It is my sincere hope that by this time, both of them will have realized that Paul Blart has run head-on into every conceivable object, and that we can finally call it a day.
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